


I want to be sexy

by sonofthanatos



Category: South Park
Genre: Fluff and Humor, Friendship, M/M, Makeup, Sexy Tweek
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-16
Updated: 2019-06-30
Packaged: 2020-05-13 03:34:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19242976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sonofthanatos/pseuds/sonofthanatos
Summary: Tweek is sick of being called "cute" and "adorable".





	1. Chapter 1

Craig studied his boyfriend with a frown. Tweek was definitely unhappy about something; he was quieter than normal, was biting his lip, and seemed totally lost in his own world.  
  
He wracked his brain for any clues. The day had been totally normal; they had exchanged good morning kisses, gone to school together, laughed at Clyde together when he walked into a door while staring at Bebe in her new skirt, but then Tweek had suddenly gone quiet. Craig couldn't figure out what had happened, but he was prepared to go into full boyfriend mode and either cheer him up or beat up the guy who made him unhappy.  
  
He nudged Tweek lightly. "You ok, honey?"  
  
Tweek nodded, not looking up. "Y..yeah, I'm fine."  
  
"Sweetie, if something's bothering you-"  
  
"There isn't! I...just let me think, Craig." Craig knew him well enough to turn away, but was still worried.  
  
  
  
Bebe walked through the halls like a queen, enjoying the stares from the boys as she strode past and taking particular pleasure in the ones who couldn't even speak at the sight of her.  
  
"Bebe?" She glanced over, and of all people saw Tweek standing there nervously. "Can I steal you for a moment?"  
  
She shrugged and strode into a classroom, Tweek following behind her. "What's up?"  
  
"GAH! Ok, this is so much pressure! I need...uhhnn...I..." She glanced at the door and Tweek cried out "I need to look hot!"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Well, you come in here looking like that and Clyde walked into a door staring at you-" Bebe was very pleased to hear that part. "-and everybody wants you and Craig...he doesn't look at me like that. He loves me but he always calls me adorable or cute, like a bunny or his guinea pig. I want him to think I'm sexy, to look at me the way guys look at you. I want to be...hot." Tweek blushed.  
  
Bebe nodded in understanding. "I get it now. Ok, tell you what. I'll come to your house after school, go through your closet, and help you get nice and sexy for Craig."  
  
"OH JESUS! Good, that's good. WAIT! I don't have a date tonight; he has a thing with his family!"  
  
"That's fine." She said soothingly. As much as Tweek seemed annoyed by it he was definitely like a twitchy little bunny and she had to keep him calm. "I'll go over everything tonight and show you what to do for the morning."  
  
Tweek nodded. "Ok. Thank you!"  
  
  
Craig looked at him in concern after they kissed goodbye. "Text or call me if you want to talk or anything, OK?" Tweek nodded his agreement and kissed him again.  
  
He hated making Craig worry, but if he told the truth Craig would just go overboard and insist that he was fine the way he was, that he was beautiful, etc. Tweek wanted to prove a point.  
  
Bebe met him at his house. His parents weren't home so he led her upstairs to his room, trying not to giggle at Clyde's reaction when he found out Tweek had Bebe in his bedroom with no adults around.  
  
She opened his closet and immediately pulled out a leather jacket. "This is perfect! How come I haven't seen this before?"  
  
Tweek flushed. "I bought it before Craig's birthday. I've been too nervous to wear it though."  
  
"Don't be. It'll look amazing on you." Putting it on his bed, she went through his other clothes carefully. "Here." She pulled out a blue sweater. "It's the color of Craig's hat, it'll send a message that this is for him. Also put on black jeans."  
  
"Ok, thanks. That was easier than I thought."   
  
"Oh we're not even close to done yet." Bebe opened her purse and pulled out a bunch of makeup. "Here we go. First things first, your hair. I'll show you some great styles."   
  
The next few hours were spent with Bebe going over in careful, excrutiating detail about how to put on makeup. Tweek was really relieved to know she only wanted him to wear some eyeliner and mascara to bring his eyes out and a bit of lip gloss to make his lips sparkle. Somehow she had even found coffee-flavored gloss somewhere for him. She showed him how to style and gel his hair; by the time she was done he barely recognized himself.  
  
"Trust me, Craig won't be able to take his hands off you when you look like this!" Bebe promised. Tweek hoped so.  
  
  
  
Craig frowned at his phone. Tweek had texted him that he was getting a ride to school instead of taking the bus, so Craig had texted him to meet up at school. So far Tweek hadn't answered; Craig wondered if he was still upset about whatever had happened yesterday.  
  
His thoughts were interrupted by the sudden realization that people were looking at him and whispering; some were giggling. He looked around in confusion but he was wearing clean clothes and smelled ok; what was going on?  
  
Clyde came flying around the corner, Jimmy hobbling after him. They both had massive grins on their faces.  
  
"Craig!" Clyde all but shrieked. "Have you seen Tweek? Please tell me you haven't seen him yet!"   
  
"Is he here yet?"  
  
"Oh thank God! I have to get a video of this!" Clyde fumbled with his phone. Jimmy was grinning broadly at him.   
  
"What's going on?"  
  
"Y...you....y...y...yououou're in f-f-for a treat today!" Jimmy watched him eagerly.   
  
Token materialized next, smiling warmly. "You might want to get some water or something."  
  
"What?"  
  
The crowd seemed to part like the red sea. Craig looked up...and stared. His knees actually got weak and he gripped onto Clyde for support, staring at what was coming for him.  
  
Tweek walked forward like an apparition from Craig's deepest fantasies. His normally messy blonde hair had been swept up and carefully styled, managing to look both carefree and perfect at the same time. His eyes seemed huge and dark, gazing at him inscrutably over pink, kissable lips that seemed to sparkle in the light. He wore a dark leather jacket and navy shirt that stood in contrast to his pale skin and blonde hair, giving him an edgy, bad-boy look that continued with his dark jeans.   
  
He stopped in front of Craig, smiling nervously. "Hi Craig!"  
  
Craig's mouth opened and closed several times. He was finally able to let out "uhh...hrrn...du...be...wh...."  
  
As his friends laughed and applauded, Tweek flushed. "Do you like it?"  
  
"I...uh...uh..."  
  
"I think he likes it." Jimmy teased, studying Craig eagerly. Clyde was cracking up behind his phone, which he had aimed straight at Craig.  
  
Craig opened his mouth a few more times, then gave up. Lunging, he caught up Tweek in his arms, kissing him deeply; his lips even tasted like coffee. Tweek squeaked, then melted into his arms.  
  
Not removing his mouth, Craig pulled him into a nearby classroom and shut the door in the faces of their friends.  
  
  
  
Tweek wore a smug look for the rest of the day. Every time Craig's eyes fell longingly on him, every time he saw his boyfriend break off what he was doing to stare at him, when Craig tripped and fell into a garbage can because he couldn't stop staring, Tweek felt a rush of satisfaction. He knew Craig loved him, but for the first time he knew that Craig DESIRED him. For the rest of his life, he would treasure the moment he rendered Craig speechless in front of the world.  
  
He was definitely wearing the jacket more often at least.


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A few people asked me about Craig's point of view. I can't resist peer pressure so here you go!

Craig felt like an idiot.  
  
Normally he prided himself on being composed and steady, on controlling his emotions and holding himself together. He hadn't lost control in a long time. Years of work, of control, of building his reputation, gone in an instant. Now he was reduced to a babbling wreck, an embarrassment that the others were all laughing at.  
  
No matter what he did, he couldn't get the image out of his mind. Tweek's carefully styled blonde hair, his enormous dark eyes, his pink, glittering lips that tasted like coffee...he hadn't even been able to speak properly when he saw Tweek for the first time, and it was only once he was gone that he realized Clyde had actually recorded his reactions. He needed to kill his friend, then shatter his phone, melt the individual parts, and bury them in different states to keep anybody from seeing his most humiliating moment.  
  
"CRAIG!"  
  
Craig jumped, suddenly realizing that Jimmy had been trying to get his attention. "Sorry Jim, what's, um, what's going on?"  
  
"The lab?" At Craig's blank look Jimmy rolled his eyes fondly. "The biology lab we're supposed to do today? The thing we're working on? The stuff in front of you?"  
  
Craig blinked and looked down, for the first time realizing he was in a classroom. "Oh. Oh! Sorry, I'm here now."  
  
"You've g-g-got it bad. Maybe I should put a picture of Tweek on the report." Jimmy teased. "This is an experiment wherein we expose a teenage boy to his sexy boyfriend and witness his total d-d-d-d-deterioration."  
  
Craig shook his head, dangerously close to blushing. "I just wasn't expecting that."  
  
Jimmy grinned at him. "You've got it bad, don't you?"  
  
Ignoring him, Craig determinedly pulled the report closer and studied it. "Ok we have to dissect the starfish and put the...the...th..." His voice trailed off as he happened to catch sight of Tweek walking by the door.  
  
Jimmy nudged him. "Down boy. We have w-w-w-work to do."  
  
"Mmmm. Sure Token." Craig murmured. Jimmy lost it at that point and erupted in laughter.  
  
  
  
Craig breathed in and out carefully as they walked through the halls during break. He was absolutely determined not to make more of an idiot of himself than he already had. Jimmy had already texted the others about him in biology, and he and Token had been teasing him nonstop.  
  
As the three boys walked through the halls, Craig caught his breath at the sight of his gorgeous, sexy boyfriend leaning against a locker talking to Clyde. For the first time he noticed that under the leather jacket the shirt was the same colour as his hat.  
  
Ignoring the teasing of the others and Clyde's open smirk, he met Tweek's eyes and nodded to him casually. He could do this. He could be casual around Tweek. He gazed at his boyfriend, unable to tear his eyes away, but deliberately ignoring the desperate urge to charge at him and instead walking casually, slowly, calmly...  
  
Out of nowhere his legs hit something hard. He lurched forward and tried to catch himself, but failed miserably and somehow managed to fall headfirst into the garbage can.  
  
Dimly he could hear the howls of laughter erupt but it was drowned out by his utter humiliation.  
  
"Do you need a hand?" Token's voice came through, still filled with laughter.  
  
_No, just leave me here,_ Craig thought dully. _Here lies a broken man, humiliated and ruined because his boyfriend decided to be as hot as possible and he lost the ability to think. I can be a monument to Tweek's sexiness._  
  
Hands gripped him. The garbage can tilted and Token and Clyde eased him out, both boys grinning madly. Luckily there hadn't been anything disgusting in there, so he just brushed himself off and looked up.  
  
"Don't you say a wo...w..." Craig trailed off as Tweek's huge, dark eyes gazed at him in concern, suddenly right in front of him.  
  
"Are you OK?" Tweek asked anxiously. Craig opened and closed his mouth a few times, trying to remember how to speak.  
  
"You might have to go change. I think you broke him." Clyde teased. It was so rare to see Craig flustered he was enjoying every minute.  
  
Tweek giggled at the dumbstruck look on Craig's face; the noirette could only imagine how stupid he looked. He debated fleeing for his life and dignity, but settled for putting his arm around Tweek's shoulders and forcing his expression into a poker face.  
  
"So how's school?" He asked, ignoring their snickering and feeling Tweek shake and giggle next to him.  
  
  
  
The rest of the day was just as difficult. Craig wondered if his dad had enough liquor to kill all memory of this day. He had made Tweek pose for enough pictures that he would have them forever. As long as Clyde had that damned video anyways.


End file.
